Brothers. The silent bond.

Yesterday during ABA my child spoke- like really spoke. He saw his brother through the window and said "hi lil bro"! If that is not something that melts your heart, I don't know how much more gushy I can get!
So lets back up- here I was at the end of my second pregnancy and very unsure if my oldest was going to handle sharing his mom. Let me remind you we did not have a diagnosis for Conner. I had noticed a pattern that Conner did not respond well to change but I thought he has just had a rough year considering we just moved again, he had just gotten his father back and here I was with this big old belly and wasn't my energized self. I still remember friends from back home asking "is Conner excited" and "does the big brother want a brother or a sister"?! Now ill be 100% honest, I didn't want people to know my child was different. I was I guess "ashamed" that my almost four year couldn't speak and even more that he had no idea what a baby was and that we were going to be bringing one home to stay. So my answer was almost always "yes he is" or "we will see how he does".
Conner started daycare a few months before my delivery because I was high risk due to my pregnancy with Conner so his doctor recommended daycare to help get him socialized. Me and my fifty pounds of extra weight was glad to take Conner somewhere so I could just sit down and relax even if it was only for 2 hours. I did feel guilty though cause I knew he gave his daycare teachers a run for the money haha. Conner would say in daycare for a little under a year and I felt like it helped- a little. It got to the point that my four year old was still in the 2-3 year old class and honestly I think it held him back from learning what the average 4 year old would be learning. After he was diagnosed and his therapies started picking up I felt like it was holding him back so I just up and stopped taking him. He didn't like daycare toward the end anyways.
So when I went into labor with Colten I had dropped Conner off at school hen went to the doctors to find out I was not going to be seeing Conner again before I delivered because my labor was starting and I needed to get to the hospital for surgery. Thankfully at the time I had an incredible bond with my neighbor and she thankfully was able to pick up Conner from daycare and she watched him until later that evening when Miguel brought him to the hospital. My mom flew in and after I delivered a healthy 6lb 13oz baby boy my husband left the hospital to pick up Conner and my mom to come to the hospital. Enough about me birthing kids now right!Haha
So I'm assuming they walked Conner into the hospital okay but the moment he saw me on the hospital bed all Conner wanted to do was jump and play- now I just had major surgery so this mama was in no mood! We tried showing him his new brother and well he had no interest in him. Needless to say we did not get the typical big brother holds little brother in the hospital picture. Conner was very upset and all over the place so I knew they needed to get him home. Saying bye to him was the worst- I heard him screaming all the way down the hallway because my poor kid didn't understand why he wasn't allowed to leave with his mama. Because we knew this wasn't the best experience for him we all decided that it would be best if my mother stayed with me for the remainder of my hospital stay and Conner would stay at home with his dad. The next week was followed by temper tantrums and ear holdings because the baby was loud and was getting all of our attention.
I remember crying when my mother was leaving after only staying for a short week. How was I supposed to adjust to two kids- one a newborn and one who had way to much energy and didn't know how to listen?! Needless to say I did it and I'm proud to say to this day nobody could do my job better than me. I'd love to see my mom, sister, husband, even my best friend take care of my kids and deal with what I have to for one whole day: oh man would that be a reality show haha.
Little Colten was hospitalized for 5 days a few weeks later and my mother and sister came to stay with Conner so my husband could stay with my newborn and me in the hospital while they ran tests. I know my mom and sister had lots of fun with crazy Conner and my three nieces and nephew all in one haha.
Now Conner and his new baby brother Colten didn't have a bond until recently and honestly I wish it would have happened months and months ago. Colten was only six months old when Conner was diagnosed and a few weeks later he started occupational and speech therapy. It wasn't until this past summer right before Colten turned one that Conner really started giving him the "normal" brother attention. Even thanks to ABA therapy it's more like "hey" and "no" because Colten wants his big brothers toys.
I call their bond silent because Colten loves his brother so much, but because there isn't speech they are not as close as the average brothers their age. Lately Conner has been paying so much more attention to his little brother that I know their silent bond is strengthening and that's one more checklist off our to do list.
Of course this is only the beginning of their lives and friendship so as their mother my wish for my two sons is that their bond is everlasting and hopefully one day soon their conversations will last for hours and hours.